You know what phrase I would like to edit.
'Don't let life change you.'
I would like to have the edited version be this:
"Life is going to change you, so choose it to be for the better."
Note: If someone has already put their stamp on this quote, share a name with me, I've searched all morning for a version of this and came up with nothing. Being an internet MacGyver isn't a skill of mine.
Here's what I've learned about this thing called life. It is going to change you whether you want it to or not. If you resist the change, you'll likely end up with 2 outcomes. 1. Stuck in the same spot, with life happening around you and you're still there stuck in the past. 2. Fighting with life and everyone because you're resisting the change.
Of course, there's the ever frightening option of it changing you for the worse right; life damaging you in some way. Of course, this negative outcome is possible for everyone of us, yet you see people daily, going through tragedies, and them becoming better because of it.
You know the difference between it going to the negative vs the positive? It's a simple choice.
You can choose to allow the negative circumstances that life throws at you, to break you or stretch you. Either way you have to face the darkness head on, but it's allowing it to teach you instead of beat you.
The question I've been asked time and time again, "Hope how do you not let this all just beat you up?" It's a fair question, and I truthfully never had the adequate answer, because I would often reply with, "You know I don't know..."
Here's the conclusion I've come to. I've done my fair share of, "Oh poor me", then I've done the "Ignoring life's problems by going numb between one substance or another", then came the "angry at everyone because life's trying to change me" to eventually letting go and giving in. It didn't just happen naturally, I had to go through my stages.
I think that's why people don't always reach the positive point, because it takes work and a lot of mistakes to get there. It takes admitting that you have the work to do. It takes the desire to get to that space. It takes patience, compassion, and a lot of forgiveness. It takes love. For yourself, the people around you, and your life. It takes waking up and saying, "Okay I'm going to learn as much as I can from all life is bringing me, so I can grow."
Life isn't meant to be you staying the same person your whole life or we would all be walking around sucking our thumbs still. It's up to us if we choose to be a better version of ourselves everyday, if we stay stuck in the same place, or if we go backwards. No matter what you choose, life will still be here, and it will change you whether you're ready or not.
I hope to always allow life to change me for the better. I know it will take daily work for me to not get stuck or angry, as those are my go to negative bus stops. However, if I show up daily open to life, I hope that life will keep pushing me forward and I'll be able to stay on my own two feet in the process. I hope the same for you all as well.